Dirty Old Men

Two old men sit on a stoop. The deep lines in their faces suggest a life well-lived. It’s early in the evening and the sun has just begun its descent towards the horizon.

A young woman walks down the sidewalk towards them. She looks as if she’s just gotten off work. Her two inch heels click gently against the cement and a blue dress hangs from her wiry frame. The men looked down from the top of stoop and commented.

“Look at this one.”

“She's just a tiny little thing, isn’t she?”

“Just a little snack. A little appetizer.”

“Nothing wrong with that.”

“Mmmmhmmmm….” says one man, as he licks his lips.

Their gaze lingers on the woman in blue as she clicks away, shrinking into the distance, until it's is caught by a shorter, heavy-set woman walking her dog.

“Now that’s the entree”

“Thick as can be.”

“I’d handle all of that ass in every position.”

“Nope. I put the bigger ones on top strictly. I wanna feel the weight. Like we’re having a threesome with gravity.”

“Haha! Look at you Mr.Neil Degrasse Tyson. Mixing sex and science. That makes too much sense. I can’t argue with it.”

The dirty old men chuckle. They look up to see a tall, muscular black man running with no shirt on. He bounds up the sidewalk towards them, headphone wires bouncing with each stride. Beads of sweat fall from his glistening body.

“Well, look at muscles over here.”

“That used to be me. 30 years back, I swear. I bet he tears the pussy up. Those glutes got power. My man can thrust.”

“Why should the ladies have all the fun? He might have a man at home. I bet they work out together. Gettin' all sweaty.”

“Lord, that’s too many abs. He could share my shower at the Y.”

The man runs by, oblivious to their comments as Kendrick Lamar’s HUMBLE. blasts in his earbuds.

“And look at the backside. He’s not just beach muscles, he’s got a back on him. That body is A+.”

“I bet he gotta dick to match too.”

“I hope so. You can’t be the whole package without the package.”

Another good-looking man comes running in the opposite direction. He’s white with flaming red hair.

“Oooh! And there go the vanilla version.”

“Vanilla? I think you mean ginger.”

“I don’t care what flavor he is. There’s only one skin that’s bad and it's skin you’re not comfortable in.”

“Look at those shoulders! I would wrestle with him. I would lose and still feel like a winner.”

“Yes please. Pin me down, gingerbread man.”

A third old man opens the door and steps out onto the stoop.

“Are ya’ll out here celebrating human sexuality?”

“Mmmhmmm” the first two men reply in unison.

“Well, it’s a beautiful night for it” says the new comer, lowering his body down to join the two men.

A teenage boy approaches on a bike. He stops for a moment to look at his phone. Just then a woman in her 20s walks past in tight jeans and a tank top.

The boy sees her and his posture changes. He stands up taller and his eyes are fixed on her as she passes.

"Damn!" he yells, grabbing a handful of his own genitals, "You just let me know when you want it!"

The eldest of the men on the stoop stood up. His eyes opened wide. He began lecturing the young man, throwing punches into the air in his direction.

“Hey, now! Take it easy, young buck. What's with all the aggression? That's no way to talk to a lover. Sex isn’t about domination, it’s about collaboration. Two beings, creating an experience together that they can both enjoy. Now I don’t wanna hear you hollering that nonsense on this block again!”

"Fuck you, old man."